Never Let Me Go
by Mercs2Girl
Summary: When the Arcadia is attacked, and Alice falls off the ship, a choice to sink or swim changes her life. *Some Retribution spoilers.* song fiction of Florence and The Machine's song of the same name.


**A/N: Based on Florence + The Machine's song, 'Never Let Me Go', I felt inspired to write more Alice & Claire. I'd recommend listening to this on repeat as you read.**

**Read, enjoy, review.**

* * *

**Never Let Me Go**

_Looking up from underneath  
Fractured moonlight on the sea  
Reflections still look the same to me  
As before I went under_

"Alice!" Claire screamed from across the deck of the Arcadia as she saw the one Osprey that Alice hit with her quarter filled shotgun shells come to an explosive end. It blasted the brunette off the side of the ship, flames coming from the fallen craft. She herself was in the midst of dodging bullets, coming from the guns of the Umbrella goons, and the woman in the purple cat suit with the similar device Claire had been planted with not that long ago. She ducked down around the corner of one of the shipping crates, panting. She had bruises and cuts, and narrowly avoided a few grazed bullets on her arms as she fired the few rounds remaining in one of the soldier's guns. She had to get to Alice. At this point, it was fight, flight, or death.

_And it's peaceful in the deep  
'Cause either way you cannot breathe  
No need to pray, no need to speak  
Now I am under_

Bitter cold water pierced Alice's skin when she fell back first into the Pacific Ocean's wicked waves. She gasped sharply from the impact itself, taking in water straight to her lungs. She did her best while falling to expel what she had inhaled, and for that moment of deafening solidarity, she simply stared off into the empty space of the water above her. The ill-omened shape of the _S.S. Arcadia _remained, flashes of explosions flickering from on the deck as debris went flying from the blast as well. It was oddly relaxing, just floating in the thick mass of water, dead silent except for the heart beat in her ears.

Her heart. Still beating. Her lungs. Running out of air…

It was fight, flight, or death.

And while the world above was fighting for their lives, some more misfortunate than others, Alice closed her eyes, her conscious mind fading away to darkness the farther and farther her body sank towards the ocean bed.

* * *

_Oh, and it's breaking over me  
A thousand miles out to the sea bed  
Found the place to rest my head_

Claire knew that with the survivors dying around her one by one, death by bullet or death by drowning was almost her only option. She hadn't fought this hard to die, not just yet. And certainly not alone. Finding her path, she tucked her head, and ran to the starboard side of the ship. She had lost track of her brother, and she prayed K-mart had found a place below to hide like she had instructed the teen. With a gasp of air, Claire leapt of the side of the railing where the Osprey had just missed, and she went feet first down towards the depths of the Pacific. Boots hit the water, and she held her breath as the frigid temperatures truly hit her. No matter, she came up, taking a deep breath while she swam forward amongst shrapnel and other emaciated debris from the ship and craft, and soon went under again, swimming downward. At least the light was still filtering in through the water, and she was able to see a black figure gracefully floating down, like a bird's feather dropped from a great height. Back and forth, farther and farther away the shape went. Claire took what strength her body could muster, and cut through the depths of the water until she was upon Alice's still form, taking her lithe but light body towards the surface. She struggled, kicking her legs as hard as they could move. Breaking the surface, she gasped, Alice cradled in her arms, head lolling against her shoulder. Holding back tears, Claire used the current to her advantage, and began drifting back to the boat's loading dock where the motorboat she, Alice, and her brother had used to get to the container ship remained.

_Never let me go, never let me go  
Never let me go, never let me go_

Alice had felt nothing but the waves taking her to the darkest recesses of her mind, everything else blacked out of her mind frame. It was almost like a clean slate, or a fresh blackboard in elementary school. All that had been written, erased, and rewritten was gone, cleansed away with the memory. It was a feeling of relief, literally washing over her.

_And the arms of the ocean are carrying me  
And all this devotion was rushing over me_

Out of breath, her chest protesting the pain, Claire lugged Alice onto the loading dock. Explosions and fifty millimetre rounds were still being fired, but on this side of the ship, they weren't noticeable, at least, not yet. Tearing off her vest, she laid Alice flat out with the material supporting her neck. Skin pale like snow, lips a sickening shade of blue, Claire felt her stomach tightening. She had to save her, or at least, try her damned hardest until she collapsed from exhaustion.

_And the questions I have for a sinner like me  
But the arms of the ocean deliver me_

"C'mon…" Claire panted, her hands furiously working to pump above Alice's heart, trying to get it to start again after she felt no heartbeat in Alice's jugular, and clearly, no breath sounds were present. She counted out the beats in her head, remembering some but not all basic first aid training. The gunshots and screams of horror continued above them, but right now, Claire had to save a life; a very important life belonging to her saviour, and the woman she loved. "Don't you die on me…" She whispered before pinching Alice's nose, tipping her head back, and planting her lips to Alice's gaping mouth, trying to get air back into her lungs. She repeated the process, dread overcoming Claire's mind. She was growing weaker in her arms with every thrust, hearing a crack of rib bone from the force she was using. Hard to avoid, a rib could mend; a stopped heart on the other hand was near impossible.

Impossible… it wasn't in Claire's vocabulary.

* * *

_Though the pressure's hard to take  
It's the only way I can escape  
It seems a heavy choice to make  
But now I am under, oh_

"Please…" Claire had tears in her eyes as she made yet another round of heart to breath ratio of CPR, her seventh time now. Alice hadn't shown any signs of waking, and out of desperation, she hit the bottom of her palm against the brunette's breast. "Why didn't you swim?!" She cried out, mostly to herself, but if Alice could somehow hear her. She went back to another set of palpations, when a soft sputtering cough startled her to the point that she let out a little shriek of shock, and put her arms around Alice as she coughed to get the remainder of water out of her lungs. Alice's electric eyes burst open, lurching forward. Claire made sure to hold Alice; her limber body racking with near hypothermic shakes.

_And it's breaking over me  
A thousand miles down to the sea bed_

Air. A pulse. Coughing. Everything warped forward for Alice, bringing her out of near comatose state. Pain ripped through her body as oxygen returned to her blood, heart, and brain, her chest tightening and releasing as her diaphragm expanded after minutes of being on hold. She leaned into Claire's comforting shoulder, shivering , teeth chattering between coughs. She wanted to say something, but couldn't form the words.

"Shh," Claire advised, keeping the woman close as she could without embracing her too tightly. She rubbed her hands over Alice, trying to generate body heat, but when she found it not working, she simply held Alice close to her own body. "Just breathe…"

_I found the place to rest my head  
Never let me go, never let me go  
Never let me go, never let me go_  
_And the arms of the ocean are carrying me__  
So cold and so sweet_

* * *

Claire sat there with Alice while the war raged on above them, ignorant to the two women in their poignant moments together. She stroked Alice's cheek, staring into the pools of mesmerising blue that made up Alice's irises. "Of all things, drowning was how you were going to leave me?" She mostly meant it for herself, but Alice focused her gaze to Claire.

"Leave you?" She was only able to speak in a hushed voice, scratchy from inhaling water. "I would've… left everyone."

_And all this devotion was rushing out of me  
And the questions I have for a sinner like me  
But the arms of the ocean deliver me_

And it's over and I'm going under  
But I'm not giving up  
I'm just giving in

"You don't get it do you?" Claire whispered in response. Alice was still shaking like a crisp leaf in the autumn about to fall off its tree to its death on the ground. "I went after you… because I never got the chance to tell you that…" Claire sighed, moving to press her head against Alice's, noses just touching.

"Tell me what?"

"For everything we've been through… I love you, Alice," Claire finally said what had pent up brewing in her mind ever since the night in the prison when Alice stayed by her side while she regained her memories, one by one. Dedication had brought them closer in the apocalypse; the fight to survive sealed the bond between them. Alice stared back, processing the information before that familiar smirk crossed her lips, eyelids half shut. Being so close, sointimate…

_Oh, slipping underneath  
So cold and so sweet_

"I…" Alice was finding it difficult to form her words. Her lips moved, but sounds remained muted. Claire furrowed her brows, pulling back a little. Was she that stunted? She was human; her emotions were there, as far as Claire knew. "I love y-you too." She sputtered before closing her eyes again. Claire's panic level spiked.

"Alice!"

_In the arms of the ocean, so sweet and so cold  
And all this devotion, well, I never knew at all__  
And the questions I have for a sinner released  
In the arms of the ocean deliver me_

* * *

Jill Valentine stood back, admiring the work that the soldiers had performed against the survivors of the Arcadia, capturing many, and killing more. However, Project Alice was nowhere to be seen, until a woman's voice calling Alice caught her ears. "Move forward!" She ordered a few of her personal unit, heading for the other side of the deck where makeshift stairs led down to a docking platform. Her heels clacked against the metal of the _Arcadia_, and she soon saw what she came here for. Project Alice in the arms of the redheaded woman known as Claire Redfield. Her brother had already been detained, and shipped off in an Osprey with many others, back to base. Walking down the stairs, she checked the ammunition in her Skorpion submachine guns, and aimed them at the pair.

"Surrender, Project Alice. We're here for you."

_Never let me go, never let me go  
Never let me go, never let me go  
Deliver me_

"No!" Claire screamed in response, holding Alice protectively, even as she had fallen into an unconscious state once more. She had no more rounds in her own Glock, but she tried to take Alice's shotgun. Unfortunately, there was no ammunition to be had, and Jill proceeded forward with her soldiers. There were too many to fight, and Claire closed her eyes tightly, holding on to Alice. She didn't know if they were going to kill her, Alice, or the pair of them together, but at least now, she had told Alice her true feelings. If she was going to die, she was going to die knowing she was loved.

_Never let me go, never let me go  
Never let me go, never let me go  
Never let me go, never let me go  
Deliver me_

The last thing Claire saw as she scrambled to her feet was Jill's two soldiers securing Alice's wrists and feet in bound chains, dragging her off up the staircase. She tried to chase after them, to stop them, but Jill simply came up behind her, and hit her in the back of the head with her gun, knocking Claire out. Everything was a blur, and the last blink she caught was the sight of Alice's face, lifelessly hanging over one of the soldier's shoulders.

_Never let me go, never let me go  
Never let me go, never let me go  
Deliver me__  
Never let me go, never let me go_

* * *

Eyes shooting open, in contrast to how she had fallen unconscious in darkness, Alice was now surrounded in bright light. Simple white design, she thought for a moment that in fact, this was the afterlife she had been searching for, that she was at peace. However, seeing the red beneath her mostly naked body, combined with the sheet tied down against her skin, she knew she was nowhere near a peaceful place. The Umbrella logo beneath her, she slowly rose to her knees.

She had failed yet again, and now, she was detained. She traced the long standing scar on her left shoulder, wondering what they had done to her this time. Vague memories aboard the _Arcadia_ came, and they went as time passed. She remained kneeling until the sharp pain of numbness filled her lower appendages, and she forced herself to sit down on the cold, minimalistic tile.

When she had chosen not to swim, she chose giving up.

When she remembered that she was love, she decided to try.

To try for that love.

_And it's over  
I'm going under  
But I'm not giving up  
I'm just giving in_

"Project Alice," Jill's voice came across the loud speaker within the cell Alice was contained in, and for now, she wasn't even going to look up. But as her name was called again, she decided to chance a look, seeing the now blonde woman that she used to know.

Maybe, just maybe, giving in wouldn't be so hard if it meant a chance to live.

A chance to escape.

A chance to get back to Claire.

A chance to live.

_Ah, slipping underneath  
Wooh, so cold, but so sweet_


End file.
